Learning the tools of nonviolence
IMPACT Personal Safety helps boys, young men keep cool

Ana Maria Trujillo | The New Mexican
Posted: Saturday, July 10, 2010
- 7/7/10
     
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Adrenaline can be lead to trouble sometimes. Especially if the adrenaline is pumping through the veins of a strong, teenage boy who has just been insulted or provoked.

"Adrenaline can be so intense when they're being mocked or insulted or threatened," said Darya Peterson, a program coordinator and instructor with IMPACT Personal Safety.

Sometimes that adrenaline can cause boys to use physical force against whoever insulted them.

"They tend to feel the need to defend themselves against insults — especially homophobic ones — and rise to challenges to fight and actually get physical," Peterson said.

This is one of the reasons IMPACT Personal Safety in Santa Fe recently decided to specialize in helping boys and young men learn the skills necessary to deal with a situation without getting violent or confrontational.

"A lot of our young people — especially our young men — are in jail often for doing what they think is standing up for themselves," Peterson explained. "They're not instigating things, but the legal system sees their actions as inappropriate or aggressive. This whole new angle of safety is looking at how do we give people the skills to stay out of that kind of trouble."

Although IMPACT was created for women, Peterson said, it has always offered classes for both men and women.

"IMPACT was created as a self-defense organization for women, specifically to address sexual violence because that's what women face most often," Peterson said. She noted that 6 percent of violent crimes in the United States are forcible rape, and 60 percent of all violent crimes are aggravated assault.

"Men are more likely to face physical violence, and we've all accepted that boys will be boys," Peterson said. She mentioned that if a young man is involved in a fight but lacks the skills to properly stop it, "that's an assault that's (similar to) rape. The victim of rape can't get out — it's the same violation."

IMPACT, according to its website, focuses on verbal and physical skills that prepare students for dealing with "challenging situations" and assailants. IMPACT students learn how to communicate clearly, be more aware of their surroundings and how to be calm during stressful situations. This approach helps students, both male and female, feel "more in control of themselves," Peterson said.

Peterson said IMPACT chapters throughout the country have a specific focus. For example, a chapter in Ohio created the IMPACT curriculum for individuals with disabilities; and Boston specializes in empowering homeless and low-income people, Peterson said.

"We are really leading IMPACT chapters in working with men and boys," Peterson said. "We've always had coed classes, but they were for men who self-selected to come, and now we're working so much more in the schools that (working with boys) has really become a priority."

The IMPACT Santa Fe chapter is working in several schools, including St. Michael's High, Santa Fe Preparatory, Institute of American Indian Arts, DeVargas and Capshaw middle schools and Colegio Sin Fronteras. Executive Director Alena Schaim is working to get IMPACT in the Capital and Santa Fe high schools.

Working with high-school students in a coed setting gives instructors a chance to teach kids how to deal with situations in which a boy feels he must physically defend his girlfriend.

"We continue to have coed classes because both parties really need to see what they're doing in that situation," Peterson explained. She cited an example where a young girl gets called a name and her boyfriend "doesn't defend her" physically. She noted that the couple can learn how to deal with the situation — the girl shouldn't make the boy feel bad for not fighting for her, and the boy can learn to not react physically. "We all need to be aware of what is in our best interests."

Both parties can learn to be more self-confident in an IMPACT class.

"There is a feeling of freedom then that they don't have to worry about what that guy thinks ... (and know that) 'that guy is just trying to get a reaction out of me because it has something to do with him. It's not a reflection of me and how I am perceived.' "

Although violence or physical fighting is associated with boys, Peterson finds that violence among girls is on the rise. "Physical aggression for both genders is becoming more acceptable," Peterson said.

IMPACT has launched a new seminar at IAIA called "What Would Provoke Me?" This is in line with its work with teen boys to teach them how to de-escalate a tense situation and not get themselves in any physical or legal trouble.

"It's key that we acknowledge the challenges of nonviolence," Schaim said in a news release. "Students might feel weak walking away or getting out of it verbally, and there can be major social stigma associated with it. Students must also learn the consequences people can face when they don't know how to walk away."

In addition to reaching out to young men, IMPACT has always offered classes for kids, which have remained popular since an abduction attempt in Eldorado in December 2009.

Since then, the IMPACT kids' classes have had waiting lists, Peterson said. To learn more about IMPACT classes, visit www.impactpersonalsafety.org or call 992-8833.

Contact Ana Maria Trujillo at 986-3084 or atrujillo@sfnewmexican.com.






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